From: Robert Kloiber Subject: Verbal aero-batics :-) To: Multiple recipients of list LANTRA-L A good day to all lantrans from downunder! I thought I had to let you in on some rather funny English/German mock translations of aeronautical terms I gleaned from an Australian Gliding Year book. A selection: (Hint: Try to speak the German with English pronunciation in mind) propeller - der airfloggen fann self starter - der airfloggenfann flinger control column - das pushenpullen schtik rudder pedals - der tailschwingen works pilot - der tailschwingen pushenpullen werker student pilot - der dummkoff lernen fliegen forced landing - trieen gobackonner ground mitout kraschen first solo - trieen gobackonner ground mitout kraschen alone precationary landing - looken virst den kraschen crosswind landing - trieen gobackonner ground mitout kraschen sidevays parachute jump - trieen gobackonner ground mitout der fliegenwagon weather radar - das olektroniken stormengeschniffer Enjoy your day. Robert >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> technical translation centre > Victoria / Australia > rkloiber@ozonine.com.au > tectrans@melbourne.DIALix.oz.au > >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> In the Jan.'95 issue of "MacUser" (page 66) I found this little gem from Marna Meltzer: The most efficient way to translate foreign-language documents on the Mac, until recently, was to use the computer as a dictionary stand. Speaking of Japan, one that has been going around our college is the encouragement on an in-room information sheet, "Be sure to take advantage of the maid." However, I can't verify the source and perhaps it's an Eastern urban legend. From: "Library (Temp-User)" Subject: Re: Terrible Translations (was: Verbal ae To: Multiple recipients of list LANTRA-L ** Reply Requested When Convenient ** I have a funny story to share about Japanese t-shirts with unpleasant words printed on them. A number of years ago, my mother, knowing I studied Chinese but not knowing the difference between Chinese and Japanese, bought me a Japanese t-shirt. I was wary about wearing a shirt which I could not read, so I kept it only as a nightshirt. The only Chinese character on it that I recognized was the word for "food". I couldn't imagine what the shirt said. Well, one day I decided to ask my Japanese friend. Apparently, the Chinese character for "food" (shi) means "to eat" in Japanese. The shirt read: "Eat [excrement] and die"! The moral of the story is: never buy a Japanese t-shirt without first consulting a trustworthy Japanese friend. --Rose Recchia, Washington, DC From: HOLMAN EUGENE Organization: University of Helsinki Subject: Re: Terrible Translations To: Multiple recipients of list LANTRA-L The worst translation I can remember was in perfect and idiomatic English, but suffered from massive cultural interference: Scene: A modestly priced Tokyo hotel (this was back in the days before the super yen). "Hotel guests are requested not to steal towels from their rooms. If you are the kind of person who would not do such a thing, please do not read this message." Regards, Eugene Holman University of Helsinki From: Chris DeSantis Organization: Brigham Young University Subject: More Terrible Translations To: Multiple recipients of list LANTRA-L Reported in _Travel_, March 1989, and other places: From a Brussels clothing store: "Come inside and have a fit" From a Florence shop window: "Dresses for Street Walking" From a hotel in Zurich: "Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose." From an Italian hotel manager: "Fire! It is what can doing we hope. No fear. Not ourselves. Say quietly to all people coming up down everywhere is a prayer. Always is a clerk. He is assured of safety by expert men who are in the bar for telephone for the fighters of fire come out." (Rrggh!) :( From a hotel in Romania: "The lift is being fixed for the next few days. During that time we regret you will be unbearable." From a Yugoslavian elevator: "Let us know about an unficiency as well as leaking on the service. Our utmost will improve it." From Budapest: "All rooms not denounced by twelve o'clock will be paid for twicely." From Prague: "Take one of our horse-driven tours. We guarantee no miscarriages." From a restaurant in Vienna: "Fried milk, children sandwiches and boiled sheep." From France: "A sports jacket may be worn to dinner, but no trousers." The menu also described an egg as "an extract of fowl, peached or sunside up." From Singapore: "Sir Loin steak with potato cheeps". From Macao: "Utmost of chicken fried in bother." "You can have your eyes examined while you wait." (Ahh.. is there another way? :) ) From Tokyo: "The flattening of the underwear with pressure is the job of the chambermaid. To get it done, turn her on." From a Moscow hotel room: "If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it." On a Soviet ship in the Black Sea: "Helpsavering apparata in emergings behold many whistles! Associate the stringing apparata about the bosoms and meet behind. Flee then to the indifferent lifesavering shippen obediencing the instructs of the vessel chef." From an Istanbul hotel lobby: "American dentist, 2nd floor - teeth extracted by the latest methodists." In a park advertising donkey rides: "Would you like to ride on your own ass?" From "Japanese in Action" by Jack Seward: On a medicine bottle: "Adults: 1 tablet 3 times a day until passing away" Chiseled in the marble facade of a clothing shop: "Dresses for ladies and gentlemen" Over an Osaka pet store: "Fondle dogs" (fondle = pet) On a Tokyo map: Osui Shobunsho (Dirty Water Punishment Place) No wonder we don't get no respect! :) -----------------------------------------------/\------ Christopher C. DeSantis /\|==|/\ Senior Linguist |()|==|()| LDS Church Translation Department |()|==|()| ccdesantis@yvax.byu.edu |()|[]|()| (If this address bounces, try: CCDESANTIS%ISD022%XFER%UTLVAX%YVAX%WPGATE@YVAX.BYU.EDU) From: rrr@twics.com Subject: Terrible translations To: Multiple recipients of list LANTRA-L >>My all-time favorite, though, is a blurb I saw on a chocolate-bar >>wrapper about six years ago: >> "Soft and mild, like a Japanese woman >> Good flavor and full of juice" Well, then I have to add my all-time favourite. Window sign in a coffee shop near Ebisu Station: CAFE SCHWANZ TAKE-OUT OK -- Rene von Rentzell rrr@twics.com Windshield/windscreen wipers (Ypres? :-) = der Flippenflappenmu From: Chris DeSantis Organization: Brigham Young University Subject: German Lesson #7 To: Multiple recipients of list LANTRA-L Dear Lantrans: The Verbal Aerobatics posting reminded me that I have had this in my file for about 20 years. I regret I do not know the author. German Lesson #7 Dog: Barkenpantensniffer Dog Catcher: Barkenpantensniffersnatcher Dog Catcher's Truck: Barkenpantensniffersnatcherwagen Garage for Truck: Barkenpantensniffensnatcherwagenhaus Truck Repairman: Barkenpantensniffensnatcherwagen- mechanikerwerker Mechanic's Union: Barkenpantensniffensnatcherwagen- mechanikerwerkerfeatherbedden- gefixengruppe Doctor: Chestergethumpenpulsentooker Nurse: Chestergethumpenpulsentookerhelper Hypodermic Needle: Chestergethumpenpulsentooker- helperhurtensticker Backside: Chestergethumpenpulsentooker- helperhurtenstickerstabbenplatz Piano: Plinkenplankenplunkenbox Pianist: Plinkenplankenplunkenboxgepounder Piano Stool: Plinkenplankenplunkenboxgepounder- spinnenseat Piano Recital: Plinkenplankenplunkenboxgepounder- offengeshowenspelle Fathers at the Recital: Plinkenplankenplunkenboxgepounder- offengeshowenspellensnoozengruppe Mothers at the Recital: Plinkenplankenplunkenboxgepounder- offengeshowenspellensnoozen- gruppenuppenwakers Automobile: Honkenbrakenscreecher Gasoline: Honkenbrakenscreecherzoomerjuicen Driver: Honkenbrakenscreecherguidenschtunker Auto Mechanic: Honkenbrakenscreecherknockengepinger- sputtergefixer Repair Bill: Bankenrollergebustenuptottenliste :) ccdesantis@yvax.byu.edu From: bill Subject: Re: German Lesson #7 To: Multiple recipients of list LANTRA-L In-Reply-To: Message of Wed, 29 Mar 1995 08:52:11 -0700 from Some of these alleged examples of Pennsylvania Dutch go back to Dave Morrah, who used to write for the Satruday Evening Post (when it was a real magazine). He had a series, with one of the characters being Heinrich Schnibble, who used these "words" in conversation with outsiders, who usually wound up talking the same way he did and utterly confused. I have listings for three Morrah books (all Rinehart & Co.): *Cinderella Hassenpfeffer (sic) and Other Tales Mein Grossfader Told*, Fraulein Bo-peepen and More Tales Mein..* and *Heinrich Schnibble and Even More Tales...* I believe all have glossaries. BTW, about 1960 the *Spiegel* did an article about a so-called German-American (sic) Rocket Dictionary put out in Huntsvill, AL. Here are three examples that were given: warhead das Lautenboomer atomic warhead das eargeschplittene Lautenboomer hydrogen warhead das eargeschplittene Lautenboomer mit grossem Holengraund und alles kaputt! Enjoy, bill W. M. Park, Foreign Languages, UNCC, Charlotte, NC 28223 USA I had a friend who got back from India recently, where one of the rules of a hotel he was about to stay in was "No spiting (sic) on the walls." He decided this hotel was a little too grungy for his tastes, but when the manager asked him why he didn't want to stay he responded that he really had been looking forward to spitting on the walls and would look for a hotel that permitted it. My friend saw plenty of other funny signs and the like. I'll try to pump him for some more. Oh yeah, when I lived in Suriname all the video stores had pirated videos from Miami cable TV. I was browsing the selections and two videos caught my eye. One was "Dead On The Nail," the other "Deep Trout." Anyone care to guess what these were? (Hint: First one was an Agatha Christie, the second was X-rated). Humbly yours (in an apish kind of way), Atticus _____________________________________________________________ | Atticus Killough QMI ...and... TEUTONIC TRANSLATIONS | | ISO 9000 Registration/Seminars Phone: (214) 401-4194 | | German/English Translations Phone/Fax: (214) 721-0834 | | Web Sites: http://www.pic.net/qmi/ (ISO 9000) | | http://www.pic.net/people/teutonic/teutonic.html | \______________________________________________________________/ From: bill Subject: Re: Terrible Translations (was: Verbal aero-batics) To: Multiple recipients of list LANTRA-L In-Reply-To: Message of Wed, 29 Mar 1995 14:00:30 -0600 from Atticus: Your second title sounds fishy to me; originating in Miami, shouldn't it have been "Deep Tuna" (with Marlin Brando, perhaps?)? Regards, bill W. M. Park, Foreign Languages, UNCC, Charlotte, NC 28223 USA Bill: "Deep Bass," starring James Earl Jones. Doug OK, I'll bite. The first one is "Death on the Nile" (not entirely sure about this, since I only remember the Finnish title) and the second one "Deep Throat". What's the first prize, or were these just qualifying questions for the real competition? -- Mikko Kauppinen (Mr)=09=09-Herrasmies Villist=E4 l=E4nnest=E4 trmika@uta.fi=09=09=09-Transla ry:n tutorvastaava vuonna 1995 http://www.uta.fi/~trmika/ A running gag and (probably) popular myth is how the popular drink "calpis" got its name. Allegedly, some American worked for this soft-drink-company, and was really pissed off with both the job and Japan. So, when they asked him how to name this new drink to make it marketable, he said "cowpiss", which then was "Japanized" into "calpis". On and on and on...a low-fat yoghurt with "For Gourmet and Ladies", the office of a lottery-company decorated with "Be A Good Loser"... Not exactly translation, I know, but, as I said, a constant source for amusement and serious aesthetic delight. Birgit Kellner Institute for Indian Philosophy University of Hiroshima I'd never heard the "Calpis" legend. Se non e verato e ben trovato. I noticed on a trip to Guam that Calpis is marketed overseas as "Calpico." Another popular canned beverage is Pocari Sweat, an electrolyte-replacing "sports drink" (do we really say this in English?) along the lines of unflavored Gatorade. Here in Nagoya there is also a chain of coffee shops run by a firm called Fukee Coffee Co. And don't forget Pocky, a popular snack that is something like pretzel sticks dipped in chocolate. My all-time favorite, though, is a blurb I saw on a chocolate-bar wrapper about six years ago: "Soft and mild, like a Japanese woman Good flavor and full of juice" ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Steve Carter High-Tech Information Center Nagoya Ltd. Nagoya, Japan hticn@gol.com From: Atticus Killough Subject: Stalin and The Beave To: Multiple recipients of list LANTRA-L >> >Isn't a translator also a diplomat? >This reminds me of the line attributed to Stalin, who once rounded on his interpreter and said "I didn't say 'riff-raff', I said 'bastards'!" >Possibly apocryphal, but no doubt relevant. Wasn't it one of the Airplane movies in which some guys were talking "Jive" and the subtitles were giving us the translation? (Not the one with Barbara Billingsly as a "Jive interpreter," however). I fell out of my seat when "Sheeeeeeeeeit!" was rendered "Golly!" Atticus ______________________________________________________________ | Atticus Killough QMI ...and... TEUTONIC TRANSLATIONS | | ISO 9000 Registration/Seminars Phone: (214) 401-4194 | | German/English Translations Phone/Fax: (214) 721-0834 | | Web Sites: http://www.pic.net/qmi/ (ISO 9000) | | http://www.pic.net/people/teutonic/teutonic.html | \______________________________________________________________/ From: rrr@twics.com Subject: Re: Terrible Translations (was: Verbal aero-batics) To: Multiple recipients of list LANTRA-L I just saw a good one in "alt.usage.german". Some American asked how to say "pet peeve" in German, and another guy supplied the answer: "Aerger mit Haustieren". I love it! .send -- Rene von Rentzell rrr@twics.com ----------